Newness and I are in the early steps of a beautiful relationship. It has been a journey of trial and error, weekends of weakness, tears, beginning again, ruined relationships acceptance, and understanding how to be filled but not full. Newness is my contentment, and for the past two years I thought they were opposites.
I am the type of person who is always on the search for something I haven’t done before, new people, new places, new views; the list goes on and on. I am a connoisseur of experience (but really aren't we all). Most recently the repetitive urge is to move to a big city.
So I dream about Seattle, deliciously brewed coffee, long streets and tall buildings, people hurried in all directions. I fantasize about New York, fresh bagels, live music, the skyline, interesting relationships, central park. I yearn for the wide-open sky of Colorado, the sunsets, the dry air, mountains. The lights of Paris, baguettes on the Seine, both lure my heart. Wine drank at a curbside restaurant, the art, walking through gardens, rooftops. Gosh just rooftops.
I rearrange my room and desperately pretend I am living in one of these places. I buy new clothes, and spend way too long looking at maps of cities I’ve never lived in.
Again and again it visits me asking if I am ready to see a different aspect of it, usually I am too busy wishing to be somewhere else. But if I sit and listen to it, it gently speaks of all the places it can be found.
Yes, it lives in a different city but it also lives in acquiring a new hobby. It can be found in a new book, or spending time with a challenging recipe. It resides in letters sent across the ocean, and visiting a friend’s new house. It has a home in buying flowers and plants, and a summer villa in re-purposing old items.
The point being it is vast, and most often found in the ordinary, with willful intention.
So when you begin to feel that familiar urge, something that is just a little off, you find yourself looking for answers, maybe it’s not all out change that is whispering. Maybe you just need a little momentum.
And who knows, perhaps one day I will move to one of those cities or somewhere else entirely but for now I am going to sit, and listen to all that newness has to say. Seek the magic in the mundane, the extraordinary in the lackluster, ordinary. Because it is about the process, remember?